Parental Love

How Did Your Parents Show You Love?

How you receive Love is how you learned to receive Love. If you never felt Loved, it will be difficult to let love in. If you received love thru criticism and discipline, you may attract criticism. Our tendency is to believe in the ways we were loved, taught and appreciated.

It helps to be aware of your early experiences to better understand what we currently experience. Our awareness allows us to better change what is not longer good for us. What we are fully aware of without judgment, we can choose to change. What we judge as good or bad, we tend to get stuck with believing and seeking.

We learn to love, teach, criticize and appreciate others the ways we were parented. When we realize our parents also follow what their parents did for them, we can forgive. When we understand we are the generation who can affect positive change, we choose again. When willing to relinquish our habitual behavior and past programming, we can change our future.

Our most early experiences program us to feel and relate with others in familiar ways. We expect what we are accustomed to. Even with what seems limiting or negative, our expectation becomes what we do or attract others to do. We may try to create something different but unconsciously attract the same.

Parents what to give their best and improve on their parents. However, when tired, hungry, impatient or negative, we often fall into old familiar patterns. To change what was growing up requires staying awake and aware. To give our children and partners our best calls us to use our conscious to heal the past.

You may have noticed that you tend to dump your worst stuff on your family. You may have realized that you are talking and behaving like one or both parents. You may have recognized the more you try to be different, the more you find repeating behavior. It is essential to forgive, delete, undo and change your bad habits and unconscious reactions.

We are right now in Portland with our youngest Grandson Guy ( 4 yrs old). I am always observing what parents seems to need and how they raise their kids. I see the ways we program kids and how they talk and behave by how we treat and speak to them. Without neutral observation, we may not even notice the script we write and perpetuate within families.

Ask yourself what you believe the job of parenting really is. Notice what you want as a child and now as an adult from people who “love” you. Pay attention to what you would change or delete from your childhood. Choose to delete these experiences from what you give to those in your family now.

Yes, more conscious and respectful interaction is beneficial to all. Yes, remove yourself from upsetting or negative experiences until you are calm and clear. Yes, give yourself the opportunity to forgive yourself for limiting or hurting those you love. Yes, love yourself by affirming, giving, supporting and encouraging you always to believe in you.

You can change your loving relationships with yourself and others every day in every way. Betty Lue

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